On Transcending 15 Minute Support Response Times

[mjzhosting]

Hello everybody!

Remember how Site5 achieved 15 minutes of fame via means of advertising the ability to provide a 15 minute tech support response time? Well that's nothing! Brace yourselves now, for your eyes are about to bare witness the future of tech support response time. Feel free to add favorable buzz words at your leisure to the preceding sentence such as "innovation" or "REVOLUTIONARY!" Remember, the more crude, inverse, inane or even blatantly fallacious your terminology is in contrast to what your company can actually endeavor, the more clients you will attract! Faux sincerity masquerading as authentic sincerity also helps. Oh, and never play with ambiguity as it makes people anxious to get back in touch with the warm embrace of reality.

Anyway, the moment of truth: http://www.mjzhosting.net/screens/572338776support.jpg

See what I mean? At MJZ Web Hosting, we strive for failure. Success is for those seeking pseudo-exoneration (web hosting for as low as $19 / year).

 

[Exon]

I'm sorry, I guess I don't understand why you're pushing "failure"?

 

[mjzhosting]

Because it is truly amazing how little chagrin the unaware individual is able to feel when yet another objective representation becomes unnaturally fused to a once living and ardor-infused subjective representation, the process of fusion drying up and solidifying what was once transient, paralyzing it and mechanizing it to the point where what was once felt is now simply toggled; removing all natural chagrin and creating new, cheapened vestiges of chagrin, layered on top of each other with actualized reality crushed at the bottom.

 

[ldcdc]

Because it is truly amazing how little chagrin the unaware individual is able to feel when yet another objective representation becomes unnaturally fused to a once living and ardor-infused subjective representation, the process of fusion drying up and solidifying what was once transient, paralyzing it and mechanizing it to the point where what was once felt is now simply toggled; removing all natural chagrin and creating new, cheapened vestiges of chagrin, layered on top of each other with actualized reality crushed at the bottom.

I'm lost. My English is simply not enough to understand that.

Still, a lovely marketing experiment to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Goes a bit against the very idea of marketing, but hey, as long as it works for you...

 

[mjzhosting]

Well, there are many different reasons for it, but I like your synthesis, which reveals at least one. Maybe your understanding isn't so bad after all. Marketing is old news.